The Definitive Pac-12 Cheerleader Rankings…


Definitive according to me anyway…

Here are my Pac-12 North Rankings

And my Pac-12 South Rankings

As I prefaced last week, I am well aware that this is completely sexist.  Second, I’m also aware that most of these girls wouldn’t give most of our readers the time of day.  But as I said, when they stop having cheerleaders, we’ll quit leering at them.  Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

Second, a UCLA fan/friend of mine whined about my Pac-12 South Rankings.  But he may have been right.  So make sure to read this to see if I’ve made any adjustments to the final list.

Finally, next week we’ll move onto the Big XII and a three part series on the SEC.  And if you have recommendations for squads outside of the Pac-12, Big XII, SEC and Big Ten, nominate them for consideration.

Onto the Rankings…

12. Washington- I’ve tried to point out that I consider a lot of factors into these rankings and just not looks.  And while Washington’s looks aren’t great, the worst part is they aren’t trying.  And a huge school with lots of money has no excuse for putting forth this little effort.  You should be ashamed Huskies.

11. Colorado- Essentially, see Washington.  I might have ranked Utah lower than both of them, but Utah has been non-BCS for much of its time while these two schools have had all the advantages.  I really expect more Colorado.

10. Utah- If you compare our squad to the USC Song Girls, it looks like Girls vs Women.  And no Ute fans don’t sell me on the we do more gymnastics type stuff, its no excuse.

9. Stanford- And here is where Stanford is getting rewarded.  All of these girls are probably geniuses who will change the world.  Yet they still put forth a much better effort than our bottom three, when they really don’t need to.

8. Cal- Cal is the same as Stanford.  This squad will all be Doctors, Lawyers, and so forth, yet they are still putting forth the work needed to look like a great cheerleading squad.  Good on ya Cal.

7. Washington St.- Wazzu is a school I wish I could give a higher ranking to.  But the talent just gets too good from here on out.  Considering Wazzu is working with nothing, they’re being all the Wazzu they can be.  You should be proud of 7th place.

6. Arizona-  The fact that a squad like Arizona is sixth, speaks to how much talent there is in the Pac-12 cheerleading squads, at least the top half.  There is nothing wrong with these Wildcats, they are just a notch less than the top four plus…

5. Oregon St.- Oregon St. gets an extra boost similar to Washington St.  They are down the road from Nike U and can’t seem to do anything to get out of Phil Knight’s shadow.  Yet here they are putting out serious talent when they have no business doing it.

4. Arizona St.-  And here is where I’ve made a change from the division rankings.  I think I was making up for my irrational hatred of Arizona State.  The ASU squad is spectacular, but when I look at the schools I’ve moved ahead of them, Oregon is doing the ASU thing as well and maybe better than ASU without the talent and UCLA and USC are just classier.

3. Oregon- Oregon is really proof that money buys happiness.  I mean Oregon used to be Oregon and now they’re OREGON if you get my meaning.  And considering they’ve even found this cheer squad to put on the floor, well it’s clearly better to be rich.

2. UCLA- As I said, I made an adjustment here.  It came from me staring at the UCLA picture for awhile and then thinking, DAMN.

1. USC- The Song Girls are one of the standards by which all other cheerleaders are judged.  If they had slipped at all, I’d lower them but they have all the talent that they used to, and then some.