Northern Colorado: All You Want To Know

Northern Colorado is a University in Greeley Colorado.  For those of you who don’t know Greeley has a really unpleasant smell most days.  It’s a combination of slaughtered beef  and sadness that they live in Greeley.

BTW- The Greeley town motto is, we swear this is Colorado and not Kansas.

The University of Northern Colorado is known as the University of No Credit among Coloradans and it’s motto is…

The University of Northern Colorado- You Should Have Studied in High School.

BTW: their mascot is the Bears and their mascot’s name is Klawz.  I would make fun of that name but I’d be reminded ours is named Swoop.  And BYU fans, yours is named Cosmo so don’t start.

As for Northern Colorado Football- They won two Division II national titles, back to back in 1996 and 1997.  I wonder if they walk around bragging about them like Boise fans brag about that Junior College national title.  In fact, I once had a Boise fan point out that Utah had never won a Junior College national title.  I don’t get Boise fans.

As for their coaches, it seems in an attempt to recapture the glory, the entire staff is mid-90’s UNC players.  And it would look like they’ve put together a really good DII football team.

Sadly, they’ve moved up to FCS or I-AA or whatever they’re calling it today and so UNC is really bad.  Earnest Collins Jr. inherited a team that won 3 games and promptly won no games.  Maybe he subscribes to the Larry Krystkowiak school of coaching and the fans love him for making the team worse.  Maybe Collins had to change the culture.

UNC’s QB is Seth Lobato.  I assume he’ll enjoy meeting Misters Lotulelei, Kruger and Kruger.

I could go on but this post has already set the record for length for someone making fun of Northern Colorado.  I hope you enjoyed this breakdown.